r/agnostic

For context, I live in the south in the US and used to be a Christian until I deconstructed about 7 years ago. I consider myself an atheist now. The culture here is very Christian-centered and it’s a bit scandalous to admit that you’re not religious. I’ve noticed, though, that a lot of people claim they believe in god and are Christian, but truthfully don’t follow the religion at all. They don’t attend church regularly, pray once in a blue moon, have premarital sex, drink and smoke, cuss, and generally just live a very secular life. Which I don’t care about, obviously, but those are things the church considers sins, and sin separates you from god, right? And if you really believed in god, you would follow the Bible because you’d be scared of damnation to hell, right? What’s the difference between you and a non-believer if you don’t follow any of God’s rules? That’s why I think these people who are “Christian in name only” are really more agnostic deep down, but are scared to admit it. And that’s okay because that’s their journey to figure out on their own, but I do wish our society was more accepting of agnostic/atheist people and then maybe this wouldn’t be so common.

Edit: grammar

Living in a predominantly Christian culture, I have been exposed to apologetic works like "The Case for Christ" or "Evidence That Demands a Verdict." These books often rely on historical oddities or weak circumstantial arguments - such as the claim that ancient authors wouldn't have used women as witnesses or that the apostles wouldn't have died for a lie. And even sometimes employ false logical fallacies or vague philosophical arguments.

Similarly, I encounter arguments from Islamic apologists who claim the Quran is too perfect to be of human origin. Not as familiar with the Islamic arguments but they fall in to the same category.

This leads me to a fundamental question I like to ask before engaging with any proselytizers: Why is there so little evidence that His followers are forced to rely on these strained, rehearsed arguments?

If an omnipotent and omniscient God truly existed, His presence should be as self-evident and undeniable as the existence of the sun. The fact that His existence is a matter of intense, centuries-long debate rather than objective, universal knowledge strongly suggests to me that these religious claims are NOT rooted in reality. In addition, there is the fact that religion are constrained strongly by culture which suggests indoctrination is far more influential than any objective evidence.

In a way I think apologist and proselytizers refute what they claim by their own actions and intentions.

Hello, everybody! Not sure if this is the right flair, and I apologize in advance for the grammar issues, but I'm basically asking what the title says. How do I tell my parents I'm agnostic?

For additional context, I (19F) live in the Philippines; it is a rather religious country, leaning more towards Catholicism or Christianity with major elements of Islam in the lower regions. My parents, particularly my mother, are religious Christians. I would say we are rather well-off, as I study at an expensive top university in the country's capital, while my siblings are both in private school near our hometown. As my brother is a Person with Disability (PWD), while I am diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, both of us have maintenance medication that is provided accordingly by my parents. Another random fact about myself: I'm queer! To be more specific, and .

This is where my dilemma is happening. I've been agnostic and queer since I was in 6th grade, and I can't fake being the "good Christian eldest daughter" anymore. I've tried coming out before when I was in 6th grade. Unfortunately, I was simply dismissed, and the topic was brushed off. I have no plans to come out as queer yet. However, I want to tell my parents that I'm agnostic and don't feel comfortable going to church anymore.

The thing is, Christianity has played a huge part in their lives. Won't go into so much detail, but ask them about God or Jesus, and they'd talk as if He provided every little thing for them. What I'm really scared of is them cutting off any type of support for me after I tell them about my actual beliefs and my sexuality. I'm also scared of them sending me into some sort of "Christian" camps or such. I don't know how to tell them that I'm agnostic because I'm scared they'll disown me.

Has anyone been in my situation before? Any advice and suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you!